TEACHING BY EXAMPLE
Titus 2:7-8
In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness
and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you
may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us. (NIV)
INTRODUCTION
Actions speak louder than words
and people will judge us by what kind of life we live. While it is essential to teach others from
the scriptures, it is equally important to demonstrate our teaching through a
lifestyle that is an example of Christ-like behavior.
In
order for us to become an example of godliness to our fellow man, the example
must originate out of our desire to be pleasing to God. The true test of a man or woman of God is
in what he or she does, says, or thinks when only God and Jesus are
watching. If you act sinfully when no other human being
can see, you are out of tune with God, and living in the darkness of
self-deception.
A
personal relationship with God or man demands reciprocation of some sort. In other words, you will treat those you
care for or those you despise accordingly.
To teach others by your example implies you care enough about the
relationships to treat them with respect and integrity.
·
Luke 16:13 "No servant can serve two masters. Either he
will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and
despise the other…” (NIV)
A common example of disrespect is the man who
says to a woman, “I love you honey,” and then abuses her verbally, emotionally,
and in too many cases, physically. A
man who TRULY loves a woman does so with more than just words, as important as
words are. He must, of necessity, show
her the dignity and respect she deserves as God’s child.
Jesus reprimanded the Jewish
leaders (aka ‘Jews’) and warned his disciples regarding their hypocrisy. These men were considered the religious
ministers to Israel (not modern-day Israel as a sovereign nation, but Israel as
God’s elect) and were known as scribes, lawyers of the Law, and as Pharisees
and Sadducees.
The Jews taught from scripture in
the synagogues, but they failed to obey their own words. They were like many Christian pastors and
ministers today who say one thing, and do just the opposite.
·
Matt 23:1-3 Then Jesus spoke to the multitudes
and to His disciples, saying, “The scribes and the Pharisees have seated
themselves in the chair of Moses; therefore all that they tell you, do and
observe, but do not do according to their deeds; for they say things, and do
not do them. (NAS)
Countless people have rejected the
gospel because of the hypocritical behavior of Christians. Nowhere is this spiritual tragedy more evident
than in the United States of America.
Televangelists and so-called ‘Christian’ television and radio hosts
broadcast a message of greed, selfishness and exploitation of the naïve. This component alone is enough to spoil the
message of the gospel, and is only the tip of an iceberg of duplicity among
those that claim the name of Jesus Christ.
Unstable
new converts can be easily stumbled by the ungodly behavior of other
Christians. The apostles Paul and Peter
exhorted the older men and women in the early churches to be an example of
sober and godly living for young men and women.
A
heartrending chapter in our history is the stumbling block that parents have
created for children by their willful disregard and apathy towards God’s
commands. Children are vulnerable and
susceptible and at a very early age learn to imitate mom, dad and older
siblings.
While
born-again Christians point their finger and blame the Democrats for polluting
the morals of the nation, few of them, especially parents, accept
responsibility for the effect their actions and speech has on their kids.
Take
to heart what Jesus is saying in the passage above. If you have fallen short of God’s standard, then simply repent,
and confess your sins to the Father. He
will forgive you, and cleanse you from all unrighteousness (I John 1:8-9). Then embrace full responsibility for your
behavior, and realize it will affect the children who look up to you as a role
model. The way we treat children is the
way we are treating Jesus, “And whoever receives and accepts and
welcomes one little child like this for my sake and in my name receives and
accepts and welcomes me.”
If
your lifestyle causes others to stumble and be easily enticed into sin, then do
a 180-degree turn. Jesus said, “if your
hand or your foot causes you to stumble and sin, cut it off and throw it
away from you.” The hand, foot and eyes
are metaphors that represent our walk with God (foot), what we do (hand) and
what we desire (eyes are tied to the heart; Matthew 6:21-24). For example, if you use cuss words, even
when nobody but God is listening, just stop cussing; cut off that stumbling
block, and ask God for help to overcome the weakness of your flesh.
Another
way we can easily stumble others, especially children, is by smoking
cigarettes. While it is my opinion that
cigarette smoking is not the “unpardonable sin” it IS a stumbling block to
children. If you must smoke, the very
least you can do is abstain in front of children. Better yet, stop smoking cold turkey (proven to be the most
effective means of quitting). This is
one illustration of what a person must “cut off” to prevent stumbling blocks.
People
are watching you and your life is a book for them to read. Each day of your life is a page turned, and
the words read by people are what come out of your mouth, and the words that
come out of your mouth originate from your mind and heart. Remember this: Whatsoever you nourish your mind and heart with is what you will
inevitably act out.
When
we sin in secret, we think it only affect us as individuals. This kind of thinking is spurious and
shortsighted. When we sin, it does hurt
us, but it also does damage to the members of the body of Christ. It saps us of spiritual strength and vigor;
it dominates us, and robs us of God’s anointing to love and care for
others. Sin will consume and obsess our
time and energy, thereby taking us away from our God appointed role as
encouragers in the body of Jesus…SELAH.
·
1 Corinthians
11:27-31 Therefore, whoever eats the
bread or drinks the cup of the Lord in an unworthy manner will be guilty of
sinning against the body and blood of the Lord. A man ought to examine himself before he eats of the bread and
drinks of the cup. For anyone who eats
and drinks without recognizing the body of the Lord eats and drinks judgment on
himself. That is why many among you are
weak and sick, and a number of you have fallen asleep. But if we judged ourselves, we would not
come under judgment. (NIV)
I
once spoke with an executive officer at a Fortune 500 company. She was a successful businesswoman and a born-again
Christian. We were confessing our
faults to each other one day, and she told me how she had struggled with having
a temper, and exhibiting “road rage” when freeway drivers were careless.
One
day a slow moving vehicle merged onto the freeway, causing her to hit her
brakes, and making her slow down below the speed limit. She felt inconvenienced and annoyed, and
rage welled up within her. She stepped
on the gas, and angrily passed the car, giving the driver the middle finger as
she passed him. As the man driving the
other car glanced over to see her rude hand signal, she recognized his face…it
was her pastor! This incident cured her
of road rage because her sin caused her great embarrassment.
·
Numbers 32:23 “…and you may be sure that your sin will find you
out.” (NIV)
Your
sin will find you out, whether it be through embarrassment or whether it be
through another consequence. Every
action has an equal and opposite reaction.
God is not mocked; whatever we sow, that shall we also reap, whether we
sow to our flesh, and reap corruption, or whether we sow to the spirit and reap
the life of God.
Refusing
to digest Hollywood’s garbage on TV and in movies, or not reading the vomit found
in trashy novels, magazines or on the Internet is only the beginning of setting
a godly example. Abstaining from these
things is a no-brainer to anybody who wants Jesus in his or her life. You must not be overcome by evil AND you
must overcome evil with good. Read the
word of God; open your Bible and give it equal time with the boob tube.
There
is an even subtler form of deception that begins in our mind. Satan and his spiritual forces of darkness
introduce all manner of evil into our thought life. For example, when we get agitated and annoyed with people, and
then allow our mind to be obsessed with critical thoughts of them, we have
become a slave to sin. The longer these
negative thoughts continue, the more we will act them out, and the example we
leave for others will be destructive and harmful.
The Disciple Is Not Greater Than His Master
Jesus provided us with the ultimate example of love for God
and man. To be a disciple of Jesus, and
to follow his example, one must first count the costs. The price is high if you want to build your
spiritual house upon the foundation of the Rock.
We must count the cost, and understand the price to pay when
trying to build God’s house. To do
God’s will there is always an outlay of time, personal pain and withdrawal from
the pleasures of this life. There must
be a deep and active commitment to lose sight of one’s own self interests. This is what Jesus means when he says, “let
him deny himself, disregard, lose sight of, and forget himself and his own
interests.” (Matthew 16:24 Amplified)
When we take up our own
cross and follow Jesus, we make the decision that self comes in last place and
God’s will comes in first place. To
take up one’s own cross means individual conformity to the example provided by
Jesus; that is, putting our esteem and values upon the eternal, and losing the
affection for what is only temporal.
This involves prolonged pain and suffering, as the flesh does not die
instantly nor will it be crucified without a struggle.
Jesus suffered for the sake of
righteousness and he did not revile those who inflicted harm upon him. Jesus learned obedience through the things
he suffered. He committed himself to
the One who judges righteously. He
deemed God’s judgment to be superior to his own feelings. With his Father’s help, Jesus did not let
his emotions dictate his response to others, or to painful circumstances. Through his pain, Jesus left us an example
to follow.
Jesus is our master, and yet he
wants us to know he is also the servant.
A true leader is one who serves others.
Shamefully, too many pastors revel in the insignificant role, rather
than finding the joy of simply being a lowly foot washer.
No one is greater than his
master. Ask someone who has earned his
black belt in Tae Kwon Do if he or she was greater than the master who taught
him or her. The lowly student with his
or her white belt shows respect and humility as they learn from the experienced
black belt. This example is an earthly
one, but it shows us that greatness can only be found in humility.
Recognition that Jesus is a King
who lived his life as a servant should motivate us to serve others at his
command, following his example. By
doing this, we in turn provide an example for others to follow. The failure to follow his example can create
stumbling blocks and lukewarm disciples.
Why would Jesus think it needful,
on the eve of his impending death, to wash the disciple’s feet? What point would it serve? Why is the event even recorded in the
scriptures?
In the ancient eastern culture,
foot washing was done as a show of hospitality, and it was a practical step in
expressing one’s feelings and affections for the other person; it said, “I
welcome you into my home as my own flesh and blood; I will care for your needs
while you are here, and if necessary, I will protect you with my life. This washing of your feet signifies my
friendship and trust. It demonstrates
my willingness to meet even the smallest and most insignificant needs you may
have.”
Foot washing was done by the
servants in homes of those wealthy enough to own slaves. It was a nasty job, as the roads were
unpaved, and often the dust and mud that would cling to one’s feet would be
mingled with animal and human excrement and urine. A traveler who had journeyed for days would have a pair of feet
caked with filth and reeking with a pungent odor. The feet would also be cracked and in need of gentle care, even
massaging them with olive oil after the cleansing. It would be considered rude to massage the feet with Popeye
instead of Oliveoil (haha…take a laugh break; everything doesn’t have to be so
serious!).
Jesus washed the disciples feet
for a good reason. He was telling them,
“You must be willing to serve others on the lowest level. You must go where others refuse to
tread. Your pride and ego, whether it
be religious or social, means nothing in the expression of God’s love. The only thing that truly matters is this: Will you express God’s love anywhere, and in
any way, and to anyone that He desires?
Jesus provided an example that
told the disciples, “Begin with one another, and then take your service to the
world.” This is what is meant by his
words, “Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also
should wash one another’s feet.”
Don’t Give Up…Being An Example To Others does NOT
Require Perfection
Nobody
is perfect, and oftentimes-extreme conditions in life cause us to snap and
break down altogether. We must be
careful not to demand more of others and ourselves than God does.
I
know from my own personal experience with years of chronic severe pain and
prolonged days and weeks of sleep deprivation how destructive a toll it can
take on a human being. I would not want
anyone to view my behavior during my worst moments of delirious mental anguish
and torment of the soul and mind. How
easy it is to get angry, and just snap, and oh my, the words that come out of
my mouth when the pressure is at its peak!
Being
an “example” includes being crushed and broken; this is HOW we BECOME an example
to others. It is in the hard press of
life that we are molded and shaped. Our
character becomes more like Jesus in hard times. It is when we fail, then fail again, that we find forgiveness,
then muster up the strength and seek the grace to go on one more hour, or one
more day. These are the times when we
TRULY DISCOVER that God is nearest to the brokenhearted.
·
Psalms 34:18 The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves
those who are crushed in spirit. (NIV)
What
is hope without the challenge of having it?
In other words, how can one hope for what he or she already has? Only when we are placed into situations that
bring out both the worst and the best in us do we cry “uncle.” When we are the very ends of ourselves, we
are forced to hope in God, or give up altogether. It is then we become an example of suffering and hope to our
brethren, and only then do we find out how authentic our sincerity before God
is.
·
Psalms 38: 6-15 I am bent over and greatly bowed down; I go mourning
all day long. For my loins are filled
with burning; and there is no soundness in my flesh. I am benumbed and badly crushed; I groan because of the
agitation of my heart. Lord, all my
desire is before Thee; and my sighing is not hidden from Thee. My heart throbs, my strength fails me; and
the light of my eyes, even that has gone from me. My loved ones and my friends stand aloof from my plague; and my
kinsmen stand afar off. Those who seek
my life lay snares for me and those who seek to injure me have threatened
destruction, and they devise treachery all day long. But I, like a deaf man, do not hear; and I am like a dumb man who
does not open his mouth. Yes, I am like
a man who does not hear, and in whose mouth are no arguments. For I hope in Thee, O LORD; Thou wilt
answer, O Lord my God. (NAS)
Adversity
works in us death. It is a death to
self and death to the cravings of our flesh.
When we are pushed beyond what our human limits can stand, we find out
just how much courage and resilience we have deep inside our hearts. We find a sense of trust in our Father in
heaven we never knew possible, and years of bondage to sin drop off in mere
days or weeks. As others watch us
persevere in the most difficult circumstances, it benefits them, and gives them
the hope and the guts to face their own demons and fears. There is no greater example of Jesus we can
provide to others than to keep trying when it makes sense to quit and utterly
give up.
·
2 Corinthians 4:7-18 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show
that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not
crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck
down, but not destroyed. We always
carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also
be revealed in our body. For we who are
alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life
may be revealed in our mortal body. So
then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you. It is written: "I believed; therefore I
have spoken." With that same
spirit of faith we also believe and therefore speak, because we know that the
one who raised the Lord Jesus from the dead will also raise us with Jesus and
present us with you in his presence. All
this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more
people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God. Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet
inwardly we are being renewed day by day.
For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal
glory that far outweighs them all. So
we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is
unseen is eternal. (NIV)
Most
ministers or pastors project an unrealistic example to their
congregations. Because they are in full
view of the public eye, they feel compelled to “perform” and live up to the
expectations of others. Rarely does a
pastor publicly share his faults, sins or weaknesses. He fears he might fail to meet the standard and criteria of those
whose legalism would surely motivate them to say, “After all, he’s the pastor,
and HE should not have these kinds of problems.”
The
simple fact is this: Pastors and ministers are no different than the average
believer. Yes, they are held to a level
of integrity that is supposed to be exemplary.
However, they must also e viewed as our equals and our brothers in
Christ, and they must feel they have the freedom to share their weak areas
without being critiqued, maligned and misjudged. Many a minister has fallen prey to the devil’s deception because
they felt they had no one with whom they could share faults.
The
apostle Paul said of sinners, “of whom I am the worst.” His freedom to admit his sin was key to his
message. People listened to this man
who once persecuted even the church, and who was not bashful about admitting
his faults and shortcomings. Like King
David, Paul was a man humble enough to publicly ask forgiveness, and for this
reason he received mercy, that in him, “Christ Jesus might display his
unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive
eternal life.”
Paul wrote to the church in
Thessalonica, commending them for following his example.
The example Paul and the other
apostles demonstrated was in everyday stuff; he worked and lived among the
people. He was not aloof from them, nor
was he a religious socialite. He had
the right to material benefits among the church, but worked a mundane job to
expose those who were disorderly and lazy.
By so doing, he left an example that gave the words he wrote and spoke
more credibility.
(This
includes older women and men)
The apostle Peter exhorts the men
called as elders in the church; the same men are the equivalent of pastors,
albeit the Western church has drifted away from the type of leadership spelled
out in the New Testament (i.e. – a plurality of equal elders verse a one-man
pastoral role). In chapter five of the
first Book of Peter, he addresses the elders who have been appointed as
overseers.
Overseers are those whose rank and
position in the body of Christ demands they lead and guide the flock. As such, the example they provide is
ESSENTIAL in validating the truth of the gospel. The true shepherd is one who tends, nurtures, guards, and guides
the flock of God that is under their responsibility. They must not do this because they feel coerced or under
constraint, but willingly; not dishonorably motivated by the advantages and
profits belonging to the office, but eagerly and cheerfully; not
domineering [as arrogant, dictatorial, and overbearing persons] over those in
your charge, but being examples and patterns and models of Christian living to
the flock (the congregation).
The Example of Parents
Parents have the most awesome
responsibility of anyone. They live day
to day with their children, and train, guide and prepare them to be
examples. Children are the most
perceptive of all critics; they can pick up on even the tiniest of good or bad
attitudes and behavior. They catch every
careless word, and treasure every expression of love and recognition.
The
legacy of parental example extends far beyond their lifetime. Jehoshaphat followed the example of “his
father David's earlier days.” David realized
how vital his role as a parent and king would be to future generations. David’s legacy has extended for many
centuries, and his influence still speaks to millions from the scriptures.
The main reason America and the
rest of the world today is so messed up is directly tied to the woeful lack on
the part of fathers and mothers who sire children like they are mere
objects. Dad thinks he is being a good
father because, “I provide a decent income for my family.” Mom thinks she has done her motherly duty
because she dressed, cooked and cared for the kids.
Sadly, children today are lacking
the moral fiber than can come ONLY from the values instilled by parents who
express their love in truth, discipline, and genuine interest in their
children’s lives. Parents suppose that
if they do “what they think is best” for the child he or she will turn out just
fine. Determining “what is best” is
most often very subjective, and based on the foundational values they acquired
from their parents.
After World War II our nation
began a progressive decline in the life of the family as an organism. The economy was soaring and technology was
advancing at a rapid pace. The media,
financed by globalist bankers bent on world domination, began a systematic and
wholesale slaughter on the morality of the Bible. Financiers set in motion an avalanche of desire for materialistic
and our nation bought it hook line and sinker.
Soon, instead of seeking first the
kingdom of God, Dads were working 12-14 hour days trying to achieve “the
American dream.” The trend continues to
rumble down on top of the generations they raised, and the consequences are
devastating. Families don’t spend time
together, and the one-on-one needed by sons and daughters from mom and dad is
almost extinct.
Great
grandparents now, the parents of the 1950’s scratch their heads in
bewilderment, “Where did we go wrong?
We worked hard and raised our kids to do the same, and now look how
they’ve turned into unaffectionate, self-centered children who care only for
themselves!”
Well guess what grandma and
grandpa, you started it! The scripture
tells the truth, and it never lies. If
you train up a child in the right way, he or she will most likely follow. If you set an example that says, “I love you
because I provided the THINGS you needed,” you missed the boat completely.
Your
children and grandchildren didn’t need the clothing and food and college
education you were deprived of as much as they needed your LOVE! How often did you take each child,
one-on-one, and spend quality time together?
In contrast, how often did you sit down in front of that one-eyed
electronic box until bedtime, compared to how many times you spent helping your
son or daughter with their homework?
Did you take at least one day per week apart from job, yard work, bill
paying and other mundane duties just to hang out with your child? Could your children HONESTLY say Mom and Dad
was their very best friend?
The most familiar portion of
scripture throughout time is the Ten Commandments. Etched in stone upon the walls of courtrooms, city halls, and in
front of capitol buildings across America, it indicts us as a nation:
Is it mere coincidence that the Ten Commandments begin with the prohibition on idolatry? Have we made our homes, yards, possessions and our 401K an idol? Did we REALLY provide a living example for our children to live by? Notice the progression of the Ten Commandments; first God prohibits idolatry, then He tells us not to bow down before and worship them.
You might say, “I certainly don’t
worship what I own!” Perhaps, but
Romans 12:1 says we are to present our bodies as a “living sacrifice” to God,
which is our spiritual service of “worship.”
Was your time and energy “sacrificed” to fashion that pristine
landscaped yard?
Hmmm, are we being honest? How about the years of overtime you put in
to buy that nice home in that nice neighborhood? Was it a “living sacrifice” to get what you wanted? If so, it IS possible that you had some
idolatry cooking. Let God search your
heart, and then give a sincere reply.
It is not as though it is a huge
sin to work hard to provide a comfortable home for your family. You want to bless your children, but at what
cost? Do the kids get their fair share
of your time? When they are with mom
and dad, can they see the love flow?
Does your marriage typify Christ and his church?
God
says, “I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the
sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but
showing love to a thousand [generations] of those who love me and keep my
commandments.” Our attitudes, our
behavior, how we speak, and how we spend our time will affect our children, and
future generations. We cannot BUY the
love and respect of our children, and stern discipline will not undo years of
unintentional neglect.
The only way we can truly teach
our children is by way of example. If
we say one thing, and do another on a regular basis, what kind of message does
that send to our kids? They will see us
as hypocrites, and when they reach puberty, most likely they’ll reject our
gospel message.
It is a
fitting end to this study to reiterate that we are a letter that people
read.
If the letter people read
says, “They are a hypocrite,” then we need only repent, ask for God’s
forgiveness in Jesus, and start anew.”
There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. God gives second chances, and He does it
over and over and over again. Don’t be
afraid to fail, or even to make an effort.
Failure is part of our human existence.
Rather, fear God, and keep His commandments, for this applies to
everyone.
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[1]The Amplified New Testament, (La Habra CA: The Lockman
Foundation) 1999.
[2]The Amplified New Testament, (La Habra CA: The Lockman
Foundation) 1999.
[3]The Amplified New Testament, (La Habra CA: The Lockman
Foundation) 1999.
[4]The Amplified New Testament, (La Habra CA: The Lockman
Foundation) 1999.
[5]The Amplified New Testament, (La Habra CA: The Lockman
Foundation) 1999.